My site meter has some snazzy features, one of which is this: if you googled to get here, it tells me what you typed in. Now most people who arrived here that way have typed in my name or the name of one of my books, or the blog name. Obviously enough.
But sometimes ... these are some of the things that brought you here over the past couple of days:
"You live in the tropics"
Yep, I do. Not sure how that is going to help you, though.
Now that sounds like a lovely place to be. Especially when I am in the middle of a copy edit with a massively important deadline. Haven't a clue where they are, though - if you find out, tell me. I need them.
Fair enough, that's my daughter.
"Luck in being signed by a literary agent"
Takes more than luck, my friend...
For all of you looking blank, that's a rainforest tree.
"Animal Farm, Chapter One"
Yet another student who wants the internet to write a term paper for them...Not sure how this site will help, though. Why don't you go buy one of my books instead?
"What do you mix with temper paint for windows?"
I haven't the faintest clue. Although I admit I rather like the juxtaposition of the words "temper" and "windows". Especially when I am copy editing an MS that had its formatting thoroughly mucked up during the process of being emailed and opened by the publisher's computer system...
"Tiderider 45' yacht"
Nice. Wish someone would buy me a yacht.
But I do know where that comes from. "The Tainted" is partly about a tiderider who rides the tidal bores as a messenger...
Uh-oh. Mate, put up with it. She has to. And suggest she try HRT.
"Comments on book ending in trilogies"
Hey, the ending is the easy part to write...it's the 1,500 previous pages that are a real pain.
"How to write in the first person"
"Traits of a good wife"
Boy, have you come to the wrong site. I can tell you something though: stop ironing your husband's shirts, and he goes out and buys ones that don't need ironing.
"Husband wearing wife's stockings"
WTF?? I kid you not, that was what was googled, and it brought them here.
Can give you some advice, though, lady. If that's the worst thing about your marriage, then you don't have a problem. Tell him to go buy his own, or to pay for yours.
Or move to the tropics. We don't wear stockings here.
And one last word: after the most recent entries, the most popular entry page for visitors is the post entitled "How to Beat Your Pregnant Wife".
Dear readers, you are one helluva strange lot ...